And the Winner is…Chris Rock

Oscars Host Chris Rock, variety.com

Oscars Host Chris Rock Gave Diversity a Platform. Credit: variety.com

 

With all of the tension surrounding the 88th Annual Academy Awards ceremony, which aired on February 28, 2016, there was no one better qualified to handle it than comedian and Master of Ceremonies Chris Rock. And handle it he did. In his opening monologue, he put diversity front and center, and it remained there throughout the entire program. The result: He made everyone in the audience feel comfortable, laugh, and of course exhale.

Some African-American celebrities chose to boycott this year’s Awards ceremony because of the absence of African-American nominees. Those who chose to attend, like Whoopi Goldberg, Morgan Freeman, Kevin Hart, John Legend and Common, were there to support their fellow actors no matter what race or creed.

Chris Rock looked sharp – elegant in fact – in a white tuxedo jacket with black pants, a perfect rhetorical nod to the controversy at hand. His comments were fair and balanced. He was able to poke fun at the issue without offending people.

The chain of events that led up to the Awards ceremony provided fodder for Chris Rock’s raw comic talent. His example showed others how to handle adversity. Rock and writers worked diligently to create several on-topic, hilarious parody videos. My favorite was Saturday Night Live alumnus Tracy Morgan’s comic portrayal of The Danish Girl.

What can we – as professionals – learn from this historic event? For one thing, it’s a reminder that life gives you choices. You can either choose to be for or against something; sometimes you lead the charge and other times you follow other people’s leads. You also have to pick your battles because there are many in life. When making those decisions, you must ask some critical questions: What do I gain from taking this stance? How am I positioning myself? Will it help or hurt my reputation?

The game changer statement that Chris Rock made was when he said that in 1962 there were no African-Americans nominated for any Oscars, and there were no boycotts then. Instead, he said, black people at that time were demonstrating against important social issues (like being raped or lynched) rather than who won best cinematographer. And he said it in his own inimitable Chris Rock way, funny and cutting to the core of truth. Were some of his words hard to hear or even admit to be true? Yes. Therein lies the power of the moment.

From my perspective, Chris Rock solidified his image as a brilliant, talented, quick-witted comedian who chose to be collaborative rather than combative.

Another big winner at the Oscars was the Girl Scouts, thanks to Chris Rock’s plug and plea to the audience to buy Girl Scouts cookies. That product placement is sure to result in a spike in U.S. cookie sales.

The action of the boycott itself and the response of Chris Rock and the Oscars producers has encouraged conversation around diversity and will hopefully spark some positive changes on the Academy board and within the voting process.

Are You Giving It Your All?

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Aretha Franklin at the 2015 Kennedy Center Honors

When was the last time you asked yourself if you were giving your all to your job or your personal life? It’s easy to skim along life’s surface without going deep. What would it take for you to go above and beyond the norm? To feel the satisfaction of knowing that you have done your absolute best?

One of my favorite annual traditions watching the Kennedy Center Honors, a program that salutes a select group of talented individuals in the arts who have reached the pinnacle of their careers and who inspire us to achieve great things. The last week of 2015, the Kennedy Center honored filmmaker George Lucas, actress Cicely Tyson, conductor Seiji Ozawa, actress/singer/dancer Rita Moreno, and singer-songwriter Carole King. One of the stars to pay tribute to Carole King was none other than the Queen of Soul, Aretha Franklin. She brought down the house as she gave it her all. Here’s what every professional can learn from Aretha’s amazing performance:

Own your professional presence. Dressed in a stunning gown and full-length mink coat, Aretha commanded attention as she stepped onto the stage. With confidence and ease, she sat down at a Baby Grand piano, and the applause and gasps got even louder. (I had never seen Aretha seated at a piano; in fact, I didn’t even know she played the piano). She began playing – and singing – (You Make Me Feel Like) A Natural Woman, co-written by Carole King and Jerry Goffin, one of the most soulful, intimate songs to reach the Top Ten charts ever.

Put everything you have into it. A woman half her age could not put the same spin on A Natural Woman like Aretha because she was singing her lived experience into the song. There is a reason she’s still called the Queen of Soul; no one else owns the title.

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A bold move: Dropping the mink coat

Do something bold and memorable. Aretha had the audience in the palm of her hand. Three minutes and 45 minutes into the video clip, she did something surprising that brought the audience to its feet: She stood center stage and dropped the mink coat on the floor, with complete abandon, showing her raw talent and vulnerability as a performer.

Connect to the emotion. No matter what line of work you are in, when you connect to people’s emotions, your message becomes much clearer and stronger. Everyone felt the emotion of the song. Carole King’s reactions were priceless.

When you’ve still got it, flaunt it. Every word Aretha sang, every movement she made was wrapped in graceful elegance. When you are a professional who performs your best, people respond well to you, no matter what your age.

When you stand front and center, with an audience of ten or 2,000, how do you present yourself to others? Take a few pointers from Aretha and give it your all.

 

A Handwritten Note? What a Concept!

july-1-2015Celebrate National Handwriting Day – January 23 – by creating several handwritten notes and sending them to people who matter most in your life or who deserve recognition. Sending an email or text doesn’t carry the same power as a handwritten note. When you take the time to express yourself through writing, the recipient appreciates the gesture. Here are some ideas:

Send a letter to your parent(s). I will be sending a short letter to my 95-year-old mother who lives about 70 miles away from me. She enjoys receiving mail, so I like to surprise her occasionally with a handwritten letter. Since she gave me life, she is #1 on my list!

Show appreciation to your main squeeze. My husband, Mark, does so much for me. I will write him a note of thanks and place it on his computer so he finds it in the morning. (I know there is some irony in placing the note on his computer).

Write comments to staff or co-workers. Seeing your handwritten words “Great job” or “I love this idea” on a report or memo, or in a special note or card expressing your thanks means so much to the people who work with you.

Surprise a friend with a card. You may be so caught up in your own life that you may have forgotten the impact that a kind gesture can have on someone else. The sentiment in your card may provide a bright spot in someone else’s otherwise gray day.

Write yourself a note. I’m not talking about a reminder note like “Buy milk”…I’m talking about writing yourself a meaningful note. It can be personal or inspirational. Consider a brief mantra that will keep you focused, like “Share your voice” or “Live joyfully.” Pose a thought-provoking question, like “What positive change are you creating today?” This Japanese proverb sits on my desk:

“One kind word can warm

three winter months.”

 

National Handwriting Day was created in 1977 by the Writing Instrument Manufacturers Association (WIMA), designed to promote the use of writing instruments like pens, pencils and markers. January 23 was selected for National Handwriting Day because it is the birth date of John Hancock, the first signer of the Declaration of Independence. Hancock never could have imagined that reference to his famous signature would be used in everyday conversation when people often say, “Put your John Hancock on this.”

John-Hancock-Name

If you want to learn more about the handwritten note, read Margaret Shepherd’s book, The Art of the Handwritten Note: A Guide to Reclaiming Civilized Communication.

In recognition of National Handwriting Day, who will you be recognizing? Appreciating? Praising? Something that seems so simple – a handwritten note – will position you as thoughtful and appreciative.

Resolve to Share Your Knowledge

knowledge0This year, rise above the standard resolutions that make you feel better about yourself (lose weight, drink more water, exercise) and do something that will make others feel good about you: Resolve to share your knowledge with co-workers, colleagues, family and friends.

It begins with a simple statement: “I resolve…to share more of my knowledge…with others.” The end result: When you give more, you get more in return.

You have been living in the Information Age for more than two decades now, and yes, people can find information on the Internet with a quick click of the mouse. However, the most meaningful information that you can give (and receive) comes through human contact, old-fashioned face-to-face interpersonal communication.

In your profession, you glean valuable information through your lived experience. That’s something that you cannot find on a spreadsheet or in a PowerPoint presentation. You share that information by telling your story. “When I started at this company ten years ago, we didn’t have a marketing director. Now we are shipping our products to 39 countries worldwide.” It’s that personal information that puts things into perspective for the listener.

Today, there are still some people who choose not to share their knowledge with others because they fear that someone else may assume their position. It sounds something like this: “It took me 25 years to get to where I am in this company. If anyone thinks I’m going to simply share all of my knowledge, well, they’re wrong!” This type of scarcity thinking holds those people back from greater achievement in their career and in life. Imagine the kind of work environment they could create if they became more inclusive and collaborative in their thinking and sharing of information. It positions them as true leaders who want others to succeed. They invest their time sharing their knowledge so that others can perform better on the job. What a concept.

Sharing your knowledge with others positions you as:

*Inclusive
*Caring about the success of others
*Collaborative
*Unselfish
*Giving
*Professional

As you think about the tremendous knowledge that you possess, think specifically about the kind of knowledge that you can (and will) share with the people around you. They will appreciate it for two reasons: 1) You have shortened their learning curve or 2) You have given them a critical piece of information that allows them to do their job.

Deliberately holding back information out of fear is so outdated. Share your knowledge with others and see how positively people will respond to you. Your giving will come back to you ten-fold.

Begin with the question: What knowledge can I share with others?

What Jon Stewart Teaches Us About Power Positioning

Jon Stewart, Comedy Central

Jon Stewart, Comedy Central

When Jon Stewart left Comedy Central’s The Daily Show with Jon Stewart, people were wondering what he was going to do. The answer is simple: He is doing good. Listen up, professionals, and learn from Stewart, who is using his positioning power to give others a voice.

On the December 7, 2015 Daily Show, host Trevor Noah welcomed back Stewart, who is bravely tackling a serious issue before Congress right now: the fight to continue funding for first responders of the 9/11 tragedy through the James Zadroga Health and Compensation Reauthorization Act. H.R. 1786 “amends the Public Health Service Act to extend the World Trade Center (WTC) Health Program Fund.  Watch the full episode here.

Stewart and a video crew accompanied first responders to Capitol Hill, visiting the offices of senators, most of whom were (conveniently) out, unavailable or in meetings. With every rejection from Senate staff, Stewart pushed on, heading to the next senator’s office, determined to let first responders’ voices be heard. There were no altercations, no harsh words, just a message that needed to be heard. The only leader who took the time to talk with Stewart and first responders was Senator Rob Portman (R-OH), who later signed the act.

For two decades, I have coached professionals on the importance of power positioning. I define power positioning as “The art of putting yourself in a place that you want to be, that maximizes your talents, skills and contacts.” Stewart demonstrated power positioning in action on Capitol Hill. In his Daily Show appearance, he reached millions of loyal Daily Show viewers, encouraging them to contact their senators and Senate Majority Leader Mitch McConnell (R-KY). He asked them to Tweet using #worstresponders. He recognized that he had the clout and power to raise his voice and raise the collective consciousness of Americans. Political leaders across the country can take pointers from Jon Stewart’s integrity and high level of professionalism. It comes at a time when lives have been shattered and communities are still rebuilding from devastation. It’s time to do the right thing.

All too often, you can easily become passive, detached or uninvolved in the issues of your community, your workplace and the world. The next time you rationalize why you shouldn’t get involved, think again. Your voice could make a difference in someone else’s quality of life.

Thank you, Jon Stewart, for elevating our awareness about this important issue. You continue to be a positive role model for other leaders. You inspire and motivate us all to do a better job of putting other people’s needs ahead of our own.

Lessons to Learn From Hungary

The actions taken by Hungary in recent weeks to shut out or move refugees through its country clearly demonstrates how Hungary positioned itself within Europe and in the world. I imagine a conversation with Hungary may sound something like this:

Hungary: “What are you doing here? Go away. Leave me alone. Can’t you see I’m busy building this wall to keep you out?”

Angela Merkel Austerity Europe GermanyGermany, however, got it right. Chancellor Angela Merkel set a positive example, one for the world to see and other European countries to follow. That conversation would be a very different one, full of hope and possibility. Germany: “I can only imagine what you are going through. You have travelled so far. You must be tired. Come. Eat. Rest. We are here to help you.” A news reporter asked a woman in Germany why she came to help the refugees from Syria, Afghanistan and Iraq who were migrating across Europe, searching for a safe and secure new life. Her response was, “I did it because I am a human being. The refugees are human beings. They deserve to be treated as human beings.” To enlighten your thinking about war and refugees, read World at War, a global trends report on refugees published by the United Nations High Commission on Refugees (UNHCR).

Building a wall is a short-term – not a long-term – solution. A long-term solution comes through compassion and understanding.

How often have you ignored the needs of another person, put your needs ahead of someone else because you felt you were more entitled, or passed judgment on someone just because of who she was or where she came from? A few examples: You deliberately don’t promote a person because you don’t want to go through the laborious task of finding a replacement. You assume the quiet person sitting across the table from you in the meeting has nothing to offer, so you dominate the conversation and don’t invite that person to share anything. You choose not to listen to another person’s story because you don’t want to get involved. Every day, you choose how to behave in the world.

I attended a program recently. A woman with light olive brown skin shared that people often mistake her for being Hispanic and they begin speaking Spanish because they make an assumption about who they think she is. As it turns out, she is of African descent. She has to explain to people several times a week who she really is. She would feel more positive if people simply asked, “Where are you from originally?”

Too often, we jump to conclusions and make assumptions about people based on our perceptions rather than reality. There is much to learn from the debacle in Hungary. It reminds us to: Stop. Reflect on the situation. Imagine what these people’s lives are really like. Talk to them. Show compassion. You will learn something. We are all human beings. Everyone deserves to be treated with respect and dignity, no matter what the color of their skin, ethnic origin, or religious beliefs or values. Accept that person into the fold. Give that person a voice, a chance. Place value on that person. Isn’t that every person’s basic human right?

The Pro’s Code: Credibility

Part 2 in a series on professionalism.

Criteria 2: Credible. Has integrity and follows through on what has been promised.

CredibilityBookCoverAs a professional, you work hard to establish and maintain a certain level of credibility in the work you do. If you have no credibility, you have nothing at all. Why, then, do people who call themselves “professional” keep ending up in the headlines doing stupid stuff that dismantles their credibility? The answer: They aren’t really professional.

On the topic of credibility, I rely on the wisdom of James M. Kouzes and Barry Z. Posner, authors of the book, Credibility: How Leaders Gain and Lose It, Why People Demand It. Kouzes and Posner have conducted longitudinal studies on the topic of leadership for more than 30 years. My dog-eared copy of the book was added to my business library since it first hit the market in 2003. If you haven’t read this seminal book, then visit Kouze & Posner’s website, The Leadership Challenge, and order a copy of the 2011 Second Edition, along with the companion Strengthening Credibility: A Leader’s Workbook.

Kouzes & Posner asked people what specific behaviors they appreciated in leaders they most admired. Four key traits were revealed:

1. Honest

2. Forward looking

3. Competent

4. Inspiring

Combining the three traits of honest, competent and inspiring leads to what Kouze & Posner call source credibility, meaning that people believe you. This is the true essence of credibility. Each of these behaviors reflects an emotional connection. They represent how admired leaders make people feel.

dolezalSpeaking of honesty…in the news recently, Rachel Dolezal, (now resigned) president of the NAACP chapter in Spokane, Washington, lost all credibility as her true race, Caucasian, was revealed. She used a few props to portray herself as an African-American woman: An assortment of hairstyles and wigs, adjusting her skin tone to appear “black-ish” as some news commentators quipped, and posing with an older African-American man who she claimed was her father. When asked by an interviewer if she was African-American, she paused and responded, “I don’t understand the question.” What’s not to understand? You either are or you are not. She never admitted the mistake she made, nor did she apologize for lying to and misleading NAACP Spokane chapter members, the national NAACP organization and the general public. Remember, too, that the NAACP, both the Spokane office and the national office, have also lost credibility. Vetting someone takes a few seconds; in the click of a mouse, you can learn just about everything you need to know about that person. The NAACP selection committee would have understood her background better and known she was not qualified as a person of color to lead or represent the organization.

In Matt Laur’s interview of Rachel Dolezal on The Today Show, when asked about how differently things might have turned out if she had been more transparent, Dolezal said, “Overall, my life has been one of survival and the decisions that I have made along the way, including my identification, have been to survive and to um, you know, carry on in my journey and life continuum.” It got me thinking about two things: 1. Wouldn’t it have been neat to have Al Roker as the interviewer? I love you, Matt, but… 2. Dolezal’s motives became more apparent to me when she used the word “survival.” Ponder that one.

Back to Kouze and Posner’s book on credibility. In a section entitled “Scandals, Betrayals, and Disillusionment,” they say, “The most common reasons for the decline of credibility are the most visible.” In Dolezal’s case, her own visibility – both physical and professional – is the pivotal reason for the decline of her credibility. The truth simply caught up with her. Had she been transparent from the beginning, about her identification with (rather than her portrayal) as a member of) the African-American race and culture, her future may have looked a little different.

Credibility is one of those intangibles in life that can change from moment to moment. The credibility that you enjoy today has taken years to build. Why risk throwing it all way? Protect your credibility; it is one of your greatest assets. It is built on the foundation of your personal/professional character, and your competence as a professional. Never compromise your credibility.

 

You Are What You Meet

Aurelien Rigart

Aurelien Rigart, Saint Flo

As a professional, you attend many public events, community functions and business trade shows. How do you show up to those events? Are you investing the time to make a favorable first impression with other professionals or are you there just for the freebies? Whatever you choose, it shows.

Last week I attended a popular annual business expo in my area. Being fully present in every encounter, I was more mindful of my actions. I enjoyed meeting  business owners and company representatives. I exchanged several business cards, registered for a few giveaways, received a few free items and enjoyed a few snacks along the way. The key word here is few. I also reconnected with some colleagues I hadn’t seen in a while. Throughout it all, I shared meaningful conversations. When I reflected on my time at the business expo, I realized that I had truly enjoyed myself because I brought purpose and mindfulness to each encounter. I wasn’t just exchanging small talk and business cards with vendors just to load my free bag with free stuff. I was selective about who I spent time with. As a result, I can remember every face, every name and every conversation.

If you attend public functions just to load up on free goodies, you’re missing one crucial point: People are observing your behavior and watching you as you approach them. They are examining your body language and listening to your words. They are gauging your level of interest in them, their product or service. They know that there are many prospects and new contacts that they can begin building relationships with in that first minute of the conversation. All they want is an opportunity to make a connection with you.

How do you “show up” at public events? Are you engaging, dignified and professional while talking with people or specific vendors who you want to meet? OR Do you walk around the event with a bulging bag of free stuff and spaghetti sauce on your chin? What first impression are you making? Choose wisely.

Lead Like a Rock Star

Kevin Mazur/WireImage for Rock and Roll Hall of Fame

Leaders can learn a lot from rock stars.

After enjoying the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame induction ceremony last Saturday night here in Cleveland (yes, Cleveland Rocks!), I realized that there are many lessons that leaders can learn from rock legends. Here are a few illuminations:

Play to your strengths. To be a true rock star, you must find your sweet spot, that place where your talent soars. For inductee Stevie Ray Vaughan (who died way too young in 1990) and Double Trouble, his sweet spot was the unique raw, bluesy sound that he could squeeze out of his guitar. That sound – which bears his name – is unique to him. Be known for something, that one thing, that sets you apart from everyone else.

Inspire others. As Hall of Famer Stevie Wonder introduced inductee Bill Withers, he praised Withers’ soulful compilations like Lean on Me, Ain’t No Sunshine, Grandma’s Hands, and Lovely Day (one of my favorite songs). Wonder, one of the most prolific songwriters of all time, jokingly said he wished he had written them. People are inspired by not just what you do but how you do it. Let your genius shine.

Surround yourself with brilliant minds. Inductee Ringo Starr, accompanied by Hall of Famer and former fellow Beatles member Paul McCartney along with all inductees and presenters onstage, brought down the house when performing I Get By With a Little Help From My Friends. Leaders can’t succeed on their own. If they try to, they fail as lonely, pathetic micromanagers that nobody likes. Collaboration wins every time. Although every member of the inductee group The Five Royales has passed, their family members spoke about how each member brought a unique talent to the group’s sound.

Acknowledge the help of others. Green Day band members Billie Joe Armstrong, Tre Cool and Mike Dirnt thanked everyone who ever helped them along the way, including people whose floors they slept on as struggling young artists. Every person needs acknowledgment and recognition. It begins with simply saying those two powerful words, “Thank you.” It is no surprise why Green Day’s fans are so devoted to the group. Their level of energy (especially when performing American Idiot) was electrifying.

Be authentic. The most tender memories of inductee Lou Reed, known for his bodacious lifestyle and lyrics, were eloquently captured by longtime companion Laurie Anderson and punk queen and friend Patti Smith who both celebrated the life of a man who lived, truly lived, every moment. Inductee Joan Jett still dons her signature black leather studded jacket and jet-black hair. She and band members, the Blackhearts, are true to the brand. With some leaders, the higher up the ladder they climb, the more of their authentic selves they leave behind. Be true to yourself, your values and vision.

Show your passion and energy. Some people think rock and roll is just for the young. Remember, rock and roll began in the 1950s, so rock legends from that era are still among us and going strong. At the induction ceremony, 80-year old Sam Lay not only played the drums with great vigor, he also sang lead vocals, as a longtime member of inductee group, The Paul Butterfield Blues Band. Let your energy transcend your age. People will want you to stick around longer!

As a leader, it can be lonely at the top. When you embrace the mindset of a rock star, you will develop loyal fans along the way.

Don’t Be a Networking Nemesis

selfish-578x295You have done your fair share of networking over the years. You have no doubt encountered someone who is loud, obnoxious, self-centered and dominates the conversation. I call her my networking nemesis, Natalie Networker. Have you met someone like this?

People like Natalie give networking a bad name because they only talk about themselves, don’t listen and don’t care who you are or what you have to say. Natalie only cares about one thing: the card, specifically, giving you her business card and collecting yours so she can enter it into her precious database when she returns to the office. She possesses no emotional intelligence or any form of self-awareness. She only wants to tell you how great and wonderful she is and remind you that you need to buy her product or service starting today. She doesn’t care about developing a relationship with you. She only cares about your data. She breaks all the networking rules.

Time for a reality check. You may find, if you’re not careful, that you have a little bit of Natalie Networker in you. It’s easy to fall into the trap of quantity (Have a goal of collecting 10 business cards at an event) rather than taking the preferred route of quality (Begin building one new relationship today). Here are a few tips to help you avoid being like Natalie Networker:

  • Invite the person into your space with engaging eye contact and a smile.
  • Treat people like they are more important than you are. Remember, it’s not just about you.
  • Look at the person’s business card. Read it. Too often this simple courtesy is ignored.
  • When you shake hands, shake like you are genuinely interested in meeting this person. No limp wrist or passive shakes, please. No bone crushing either. Find a comfortable medium.
  • Discover common ground (common interest, profession, background). You have a better chance of establishing rapport when you can find something in common to discuss.
  • Don’t overstay your welcome. Move easily throughout the room, from conversation to conversation. Having a half-full beverage in your hand that needs refreshing provides the perfect breakaway if and when you need it.

When you make connections with grace, people will run toward you rather than away from you when they see you at the next event.

Think about how you interact with people when you are networking. Is the conversation only about you, or are you genuinely interested in learning about the other person? Do you invade the other person’s space, or are you respectful and keep a comfortable distance?

Once you become more aware of your personal networking style, you will connect with greater confidence, make lasting impressions and build a solid network.