Fourth in a series.
Now that you have chosen your mentor, decided what assistance you will need and identified how to trust and respect your mentor, it is time to establish ground rules. Discuss these topics with your mentor:
- Frequency of meetings. Determine how often you will meet…weekly, monthly, quarterly, or as needed.
- Length. Discuss how long your mentoring relationship will last. You may need your mentor for just a short time to assist with a specific area of professional growth or for a longer period of time.
- Roles. Outline the roles that you and the mentor will play. Are there various hats that your mentor may wear, such as career expert, financial advisor or resume builder?
- Confidentiality. It is critical to discuss confidentiality. You must have the assurance of your mentor that all of your conversations are kept between the two of you. Confidentiality builds trust.
- Communication. Every person has her/his own preferred method of communication. What is your mentor’s? What is yours? Some people prefer face-to-face while others like telephone conversations. How will you communicate between meetings?
- Feedback. The most under-valued component of the communication model is feedback. Not enough people ask for it or give it. Establish mechanisms for feedback, whether you solicit it or it is given to you unsolicited.
- Formality. How formal or informal will your relationship be? Will you be meeting at your mentor’s private club for a business lunch, or will you meet for a cup of coffee at a local coffeehouse? Even the most formal of relationships can relax over time once you get to know each other.
- Boundaries. Every relationship has boundaries. Since you and your mentor are engaged in a professional relationship, use your best judgment to not overstep those boundaries.
- Time. Your mentor’s time is valuable, as is yours. Be respectful of your mentor’s time. Take advantage of every meeting by coming prepared with topics for discussion, potential challenges you are facing and intelligent questions that serve your needs.
What other ground rules would you establish? Discuss them at the beginning, and lay a solid foundation for success in your mentoring relationship .