Third in a series.

Every meaningful relationship is built on the foundation of trust and respect. Within a mentoring relationship, you must trust your mentor to provide you with guidance and expert advice, based on his/her professional and personal experiences. Respect her/his opinions and ideas for the same reason, because your mentor has lived through challenges that you may not have yet experienced.

Trust takes time. Invest quality time at the beginning of your relationship to get acquainted with your mentor. It is through inquiry that you will learn about each other. Come prepared to your first meeting with a series of thoughtful questions that open up the dialogue. Be respectful when you ask the questions. Here are a few examples:

• Who has had a great influence on your life?
• What are you hoping to get out of our mentoring relationship?
• What have been some of your greatest challenges in life? How did you overcome them and succeed?
• At what point in your life did you feel lacking a direction? What did you do to get back on track?
• What are the best strategic decisions that you have made in your life?

What additional questions would you ask?

Every human being has a story. What is your mentor’s story? Open up the questions beyond just career. To know the whole person, consider that person’s entire lived experience. The more that is revealed to you, the more you will understand. As you begin to understand, you will begin to trust. Building trust begins with honest, open dialogue.